Oh, aren't they just...

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Life. It's very complicated, isn't it? So many amazing and beautiful things which can happen, and so many ways in which we can fuck them up. So many chances and decisions and dreams and plans. So many people we can love and then lose and so many ideas of what life really should be like.

Oh what I would give for a manual, a "LIFE for dummies" kind of book.

A guide of when to take a chance, when to fall in love, when to say no and when to spend far too much money on a dress you will probably wear again.

My brain feels fried, it's like all the creativity has been drained. Like my imagination has the flu or something. It's frustrating, to say the least. And there are so many things playing on my mind, some pleasant, some stressful. Like a weird crush on someone I don't even know and the fact that I don't seem to own any clothes that are fit for office work (in spite of having previously worked in an office and owning over 30 dresses).

Life. There are no right or wrongs and still I'm so terrified of making the wrong decision. In spite of knowing that the only truly wrong decision I could make would be to take up crystal meth or wear a lot of pastels (it clashes with my complexion. pastel colours, not meth. Although I don't suppose it would do wonders for my appearance either) it's still so frightening that the outcome of all of this is down to ME. No one else. Oh, mother....