If things don't start to change soon I'm quitting humanity and joining a pack of wolves

source

You should know I'm writing this after 3 cups of coffee and fuelled by a lot of justified rage about the world.
I've always been a feminist. I've mentioned this before and to me it's as natural as breathing. It's a part of me, it always has been.
But still I find myself shocked and appaled at the examples streaming in through the Everyday Sexism project's twitter account. It makes me realise that in spite of my firm belief in the need for feminism, in spite of gender studies and reading book after book on the subject I've become numb to the little things which happens everyday. Maybe it's because I used to work in a bar. Heck, maybe it's because I was once a teenage girl and the sexist, violent and often abusive comments raining down on you in the school corridors and at parties made me think that it was NORMAL.
It's not fucking normal guys. IT'S HORRENDOUS.

To be honest I'm so angry I can't even think straight.

When I was working as a barmaid I once had a customer advicing me that I should "earn my tips on my knees". And when I reacted with a death-stare he had the nerve to feel insulted. Apparently I should learn how to deal with the "banter".

I wish this was an isolated incident, but it's not. Working in the hospitality industry you have to develop thick skin, because you essentially turn into a piece of meat. I have had customers grab me, comment loudly on my boobs, slap my ass, try to pull me down onto their lap.
At this is just at work. Outside of work I've once had to physically KICK a drunk man out of a cab after he didn't appreciate that my friend turned down his advances. He spat at us, called us whores, threatened with violence. Funny, really, how NOT WANTING TO HAVE SEX WITH HIM turned us into whores.

No. It's not funny. It's sad. And why is it still like this? Why is there still people who claim that feministm isn't needed, that we live in an equal society? Who say that maybe women should just learn how to ignore it, laugh it off?
I don't want to laugh, I want to punch someone in the face.

I was raised to believe in myself. My parents did a prettty good job. But still, I was also told to ignore the comments, to avoid confrontation, no not walk home alone after dark, to not get too drunk around boys at parties.
How come we raise girls to avoid situations where they could get abused and raped, instead of raising boys who WON'T RAPE? I can't imagine any of my male friends or relatives ever doing anything as degrading, soul crushing, violent and horrid as that, but to be honest, the Steubenville trials really did decrease my faith in humanity.

I'm sick and tired of it. I'm fed up with being numb and with trying to laugh it off. It's not banter. It's sexism. I'm sick of a legal system which puts the rape victim on trial, and not the accused. I'm sick of it all.  And I still, really, really, really want to punch someone in the face.
But I was raised bettert than that. So I suppose I will just have to channel my rage into something more productive than my right fist.

Why I'm a feminist (prepare for a rant which knows no bounds)

I rocked a lot of pink as a child.

I don't remember ever having a defining "OMG, I'm a feminist" moment. It's pretty much always seemed the natural way of things. I am a woman, I like having the right to vote, I enjoy being able to attend school and university and I enjoy that, at the end of the day, it is down to me how I chose to live my life. All of these things would not have been possible without feminism. Without feminism there would be no right to vote, no right to education and no right to make my own choices. How on earth could I not be a feminist?

It scares me that so many people, and what scares me the most, that so many women don't seem to understand the importance of feminism. How so many seem to think that it's an outdated subject and that it should be left in the history books. To me that's like saying that we should stop discussing and objecting towards racism because slavery technically is abolished. And it scares me now more than ever because I can feel a hardening of the climate, the debate is getting nastier and I fear that we are regressing on so many levels.

I have had arguments regarding feminism with people, who as it turned out, didn't even know the meaning of the word. It is not, and I repeat NOT, a female struggle to enslave men. It is not a crusade for vengeance or the burning of bras. To be honest I do not care what you chose to do with your underwear (or body hair or shoes or any other insignificant detail you chose to attach to this debate). You can wear lace underwear, red lipstick and stilettos sharp enough to take someones eye out for all I care. And with regards to men, I fricking love them! Men are great, awesome and I have such I hopes for the sons of my friends who will become the men of the future. They will rock, as much as the daughters. And hopefully they will know the value of fighting for equality.

Because here's the thing; we're not there yet.

I myself live in one of the most equal countries in the world. I have the freedom of speech, to travel, to drive and to make every decision regarding my own body without any involvement from the government, the church or a male chaperon. Women of many countries can become prime ministers, presidents, heads of state. We can technically, rule the world. So when I say that I am a feminist I often get the question why. Why possibly could a Swedish, middle class woman feel the need to label herself in such a way? 

And as it feels so natural to be it's not always easy to explain. But essentially it's because there's still an issue. Globally, very much so. In some countries women are still seen as second class citizens. In some countries they are NOT allowed to drive, become politicians or decide over their own body. In some countries young girls are threatened with violence simply for wanting to go to school. 

And here, in my own part of the world, there is still very much an imbalance of power. 

Could it just be a biological fact, you may ask? Well, I don't see how biology causes this:

Source

 I do not care if Lana want's to strut her naked stuff on the cover of a magazine, what I do care about is the context in which this is done. It disturbs me that initially I didn't even react, we are so used to naked women on the cover of magazines, it's institutionalized sexism have I ever seen it. Because most people don't even think twice about that on some level this might not be OK. This might not be the message we want sent out to young girls and boys. But still, we do. Daily, I might add.

Sexism is never, and will never be OK. It goes hand in hand with so many of the ugly sides of humanity. It goes hand in hand with violence and the notion that in some weird roundabout way, the female body is still a commodity. Something to be admired, touched, taken, bought. Grabbed, leered over. Violated.

I do not believe that the occasional naked photo of a female celebrity will cause men to go out and violate a woman. I frankly do not understand what makes ANYONE want to hurt another person in that way. I do not blame GQ for sexism, and I do not believe that half naked celebs will be the downfall of humanity. But I do believe that there is still so much room for change in how we perceive men and women and what values we install in the next generation. 

I strongly believe that there still is room for improvement. I still believe that there is a need for articles such as this, on how the male attitude to rape has been shaped, and such as this, on how young girls ideas of self is shaped by our very grown up world (in Swedish).

I don't think it's OK for a girl to automatically be frightened when she hears footsteps closing in on her as she is walking home on her own.

I don't think it's OK that the conviction rate for rape is so terrifyingly low.

I don't think it's OK for female journalists to recieve death threats or suggestions that they "just need to get laid" when they comment on male violence or just dare to divert from the norm.

I don't think it's OK that boys are being made to feel that they have to be hard in order to be real men.

I don't think it's OK that a girl who has multiple sex partners is considered a slut when no one raises an eye brow when a man sleeps around. 

I don't think it's OK that people believe that it's time to give up the fight and accept the way things are.

And that's why I'm a feminist. Because I see no other possible way of being.